Why Twilight Sucks

Okay so this is a very random and unexpected post. Usually these blogs are not intended to be centered around stupid pop culture topics such as the movie Twilight, but this calls for desperate attention. About an hour ago I went downstairs and unfortunately saw that my roommates made the terrible mistake of wasting 2 hours of their lives on watching Twilight.

There have been plenty of ridiculous vampire movies in the past, but this one incorporates an even more sappy love story. Hold on, I forgot to emphasize that we are talking about making movies about vampires, mythical creatures that suck blood to survive and can't see the light of day without disappearing into some kind of dust. Sounds pretty dumb to me. Now on to the hit sensation Twilight, which sucks.

This movie somehow capture the attention of an enormous audience ranging from newborn babies that can't even speak to sophisticated CEOs of companies. Hopefully if you are reading this you have not made the mistake of watching Twilight, so I will try and regurgitate any information about the movie.

I must say that Twilight, as much as it is intended to be a drama about vampires, was to me an extremely funny flick about scrawny messed up hair douche bags that can run fast and talk at an intense whisper volume. I mean honestly, if you are disagreeing with me try this: go rent the movie again but before watching try and realize how stupid the concept is. Next, turn the movie on and proceed to watch the beginning. Now, after watching a few minutes of the movie, please listen to the "vampires'" commentary and try not to laugh. Lastly, hopefully you will realize HOW dumb these actors sound and HOW dumb the movie is.

After you laugh hysterically at what vampires and a sappy love story played out in a movie is, slap yourself in the face and come back to reality. The movie Twilight is a very bad love story. There is nothing worse than a bad love story. Next, after you realize what a bad love story Twilight is, try and also think about that vampires make up the majority of the main characters....vampires.

I know this is a very childish first blog but after going downstairs and seeing my roommates wasting their time on Twilight I had to write about it. I told them they may as well have been watching Keanu Reeves give his take on Global Warming. Stay tuned, the next post will cover a more important subject, which means just about anything.

Waddle